Friday, November 25, 2016



I sure know how to pack it in, don't I?  I said to Charlie yesterday I felt like I had packed in 10 years of living into a short three years.  My first post after surgery post, one year out,  cancertwo years out and then another surgery,  discovery of gall stones, botched emergency ERCP, long hospitalizations, gallbladder removal, and a long slow summer or letting my body recover and rest.  This also meant gaining some weight.  I had lost so much weight last winter because I was living on oatmeal and bananas.  It was all my body could tolerate.  Gaining wait has been the thing I feared the most for a long time.  But, having faced down so many challenges over the last two years alone- 20 lbs in the bigger picture just can't be that big of a deal.  Today, the day after Thanksgiving- I am grateful for perspective. I am thankful that I have three years of blog posts that have provided me space and time to process and reflect and I am thankful for the vehicle it has provided for keeping friends and family updated on my very, very Ponderous journey.

As a result of successfully meeting the challenge of the abyss, the hero is transformed. The transformation is the moment of death and rebirth. Often the transformation takes the form of a revelation, a discovery or insight about oneself or one's culture. This revelation involves a change in consciousness, a change in the way the hero(ine) views life


I am indeed, transformed. Inside and out.

Here is the breakdown: 
Highest weight: 396
Current Weight: 245 (-151 lbs)
Clothing: XL, 14W, 16/1x, 18 because every brand is different that size doesn't really mean anything.
Med change: 2 BP meds (-2)
Health: Not pre-diabetic, no more sciatica, most PCOS symptoms have resolved. 
I can eat more now.  But I still can't eat like I did pre surgery.  This was breakfast today (on a salad plate): 
Mini quiche (egg, cheddar, onion, garlic- yes in a crust, yes cooked in real fat) and
greek yogurt with taco sauce- my favorite condiment! 
More than the 1 oz that I was able to eat post op three years ago.  I added back in carbonated beverages about a year ago.  It makes me happy.  I still don't eat broccoli.  :-)

Big picture- I can't complain.  I'm here.  I have some incredible friends, my sleeve sisters, who have shared the ups and down, and I am thankful for their support. Charlie has embodied In sickness and health.  I could not make it with out him.  Countless friends and my family, near and far.  Thank you.  Three years down...a lifetime to go!